New Beginnings in May

Congratulations to the six families that brought home their son or daughter during the month of May.  We also remember the remarkable strength of each birth mother who lovingly and selflessly followed through with her adoption plan.  May these babies, birth mothers and families experience a sense of peace as they each embark on their new beginning!

Been In Your Shoes

I don't know how long you've been waiting, but I know that every day can be hard.  I remember thinking that every month that we waited felt like another failed fertility treatment.  There were days when we wanted to give up, but that just wasn't an option.  We were in the waiting families pool and it wasn't like we were going to back out.  This is the good news.  Even when you feel hopeless, the agency is out there working for you and supporting you.  And the even better news is God is creating your story while you wait.

When I was trying to stay hopeful I would think to myself, "When our time comes, it's going to be a greater experience than giving birth because we've waited so long!  We'll appreciate everything more."  I would also try to do everything that would be hard to do once we had a child.  This included going on vacations, going to dinner with friends, reading, playing the piano, volunteering at church, exercising, taking art classes, etc.

We did a few things to 'help our cause'.  We sent a note with our Christmas letter letting everyone know that we were interested in adoption.  We sent emails.  We talked about it to anyone who would listen.  We sent letters to friends' churches.  While we were waiting this made us feel like we were doing everything we could.  It gave us hope.

But there is something MAJOR that I didn't know at the time.  Sometimes birth mothers don't plan ahead.  She may decide at the last minute to make an adoption plan.  When this happens, sometimes birth mothers ask Adoption Associates, Inc. to pick a family for them.  The agency will often pick families that have been waiting the longest.  That was us!  Imagine that - we were picked because we waited so long.  It was even better this way because when we got our call our baby was already born!  The waiting was over!  

I always hated people giving me their advice, but this is what I was given the opportunity to do. So, my main advice, annoying as it may be, is to pray!  Pray for the right baby at the right time.  I remember rolling my eyes when people said it to me, but that prayer was answered for us. Please remember that unlike fertility treatments, adoption WILL happen.  You just need to wait and see when your miracle will arrive.  It WILL!  The agency will help you every step of the way.  And, just picture God smiling as he writes the story of how your family began.

Peace and hope to you,

Carolyn

Previous waiting prospective parent; now mommy 

Social Networking

Connecting with a purpose; a simple definition for this internet frenzy called social networking that is bombarding our world.  Whether through networking sites such as Facebook or LinkedIn, through live video feeds on YouTube, whether journaling your thoughts and perspectives on a blog - social networking is where connections are being made.  Common goals, dreams and interests are realized through social networking. 

Adoption Associates has become a part of this interconnectedness and we believe there are benefits for you to join in too as you journey to adopt.  Check back as we highlight in the coming weeks how you can safely and privately make connections with a purpose - helping your dream come true.

 

Getting the Word Out

Farmington Hills director, Paula Springer, is passionate about  

getting the word out.  She is determined and driven in her work to help expectant women know about her options when considering what is best for her and her baby.  For Paula it makes the most sense to cross paths with other professionals meeting with women in unplanned pregnancies.  She frequently makes herself available to share adoption at crisis pregnancy centers.  Most recently she jumped at the opportunity when invited to speak at an inservice for the staff at a crisis pregnancy center in southeastern Michigan.  Throughout her presentation, she was pleased to learn that this CPC makes it a priority to present adoption as an option and was delighted to build on the strong connection with Adoption Associates,Inc.

When a new crisis pregnancy center opened up just down the road from Adoption Associates - Lansing, one of the first people through their door was our own Nancy Cannon, director of the Lansing office.  Nancy was received with open arms and was able to present our birth parent services to the staff at this CPC.  A new relationship was established with workers on the front lines of meeting with women in unplanned pregnancies.

Do you know about a Crisis Pregnancy Center in your area that might benefit from our staff either talking with them or receiving our information?  Please let your caseworker know if you have ideas.

An Adoptee's Heart for Mother's Day

Read this perspective from Andrea, an adult adoptee, who pays tribute to the blessings of two mothers... and know that one day soon you'll be a mother of great influence too!

http://www.thebanner.org/magazine/article.cfm?article_id=2092

Another Mother's Day

Mother's Day is coming... you don't need the reminder; they are all around you. It often proves to be the most difficult "holiday" for women waiting to become mothers, yet it still comes around every year. We recognize that without a baby in your arms, you're not doing a whole lot of celebrating this year. Grasp the hope that adoption brings and allow it to be rooted in your heart. Nurture that hope by: 

•  journaling or blogging your journey; maybe write a letter to baby 
  
•  reading parenting books 
  
•  attending your local offices Waiting Families meetings 
  
•  praying for your baby's birth mother
  
•  connecting with adoptive moms who have been there
  

Karin reflects on past Mother's Days...I remember the isolation and loneliness. Feeling like no one understood - not even my husband. Feeling like I was watching other people live their lives. Being so disconnected from relationships. Not participating in the joy life had to offer.I remember trying to be polite and socially acceptable while inside I wanted to tell people what they just said to me was really stupid and insensitive. I remember not liking that people knew or talked about why we weren't having children over their Sunday lunches. I remember how when each girlfriend told me of their happy news it felt like a punch in my stomach. Being in God's waiting room was a tough place to be when you are a control freak like me. Suffering is a gift that does build character but that cannot always be appreciated until you are on the other side of the pain. Mother's Day was always rough and very public. It is a hard day to bear when you are already feeling so fragile. The good news is that God is always there. Whether you have a biological baby or adopt a child. Whether you have one child or eight. Whether your child looks like you or not. Whether your child is disabled or not. Think of the worst thing that could happen to you...the thing you most fear - even if it came to be - God would still be holding us. God can heal our every wound. He is our father, mother, friend - he is our everything. Draw near to God this Mother's Day and he will not disappoint you.

...and know that we are here with you and look forward to celebrating with you one day! 

April Showers

For several waiting adoptive families, April brought more than just rain showers.  It is likely that seven of our families were honored at baby showers celebrating the additions of either a new son or daughter after seven birth mother relinquishment hearings occured this month.  In addition, eight more families were linked with a birth mother in April and are hopeful that in due time a placement will happen in their homes!  One of these families received their phone call that a baby girl had arrived for their family via the Safe Delivery Act.  Bring on the rain!